I hear this ALL the time and for a long time I thought willpower had to do with wanting it “bad enough” or that it isn’t “willpower” it’s “want-power”. I still think that there is some truth to these statements because I find when I truly look at the days I choose to eat cookies instead of celery and peanut butter or carrots and hummus that I must not want 6 pack abs more than the cookies.
However, I just finished reading a really interesting book called “Willpower: Why Self-Control is the Secret to Success” by Roy F. Baumeister and John Tierney and learned a lot of different thoughts about willpower and self control.
The first thing that is most important to know is that
- Willpower truly does become depleted. We have a finite amount of it.
- You use the same stock of willpower for ALL daily tasks
- Your body uses energy in the form of glucose for self control.
What does all of this mean?
You probably don’t have a lack of willpower – you may be exhausted from using up all your willpower throughout the day!
We use self control and willpower constantly just look at a typical day and how much self control and will power you might use DAILY
~ You force yourself out of your warm bed to do your workout when you would rather sleep in
~ You bite your tongue when your kids are throwing a tantrum about getting dressed for school
~ You put up with traffic on the way to work
~ You deal with the customer in front of you at Starbucks who can’t decide what 10 ingredient drink she wants to order and then wait as the barista says “just a second” and is gone for what seems like 10 minutes.
~ You try to remain focused at the a super boring work meeting
~ You get stuck on hold with while you are sitting at your desk feeling like you have to pee
~ You want to eat a burger and fries for lunch but instead order the salad with chicken
~ You listen to your coworker who always complains about her weight yet won’t stop brining in cookies for the office
~ You hear the horrible news and try to “stay strong” while at work, forcing you to hide your emotions.
~ You try to get some Christmas shopping done but can’t decide what to get your sister.
~ You come home to find the dog got into the pantry, again!
~ And finally, your in-laws call to say that they are coming last minute to see you for the holidays.
By the time the day is done how can you seriously control one more thing in your life?
That is when you open the freezer to defrost tomorrows chicken and Ben and Jerry practically jump out and wrestle you to the floor spoon feeding you Chunky Monkey.
Each one of these seemingly unrelated items depletes your willpower throughout the day. By the end of the day you are drained. Your body needs to replenish its store.
How do you replenish willpower?
I’ll keep it brief for now and get into some more details next week as there was SO much that was so interesting to cover.
1. Proper Nutrition is KEY – you must continue to give your body and your mind the fuel it needs. The best choices for this are foods that release energy slower into the blood stream.
2. Sleep is CRUCIAL – A well rested body will help you to make the decisions .
I have more tips on increasing your willpower which you can find part 2 here and part 3 here
Before you jump into this week’s post you might want to check out last week on Emotional Eating.
This week I wanted to chat with you about some tips to help you begin to combat emotional eating. (And I say “begin”, because this will take practice and of course reading one blog post isn’t going to solve all the problems now is it?)
I gave you a sneak peak at this tip last week. I’ll give you an example from one of the women in a recent challenge group. Here was the situation, Eileen* (not really her name, but really her story) shared experiences of how she would “zone out” while eating. She would get into a zone where she just ate and ate and next thing she knew the entire pot of pasta was gone. I asked her a few questions to help her become more aware of when and why she might be doing this. When I asked her “when was the first time you remember doing this” she shared that it was back in High School – you know, when cliques start to form and girls can be downright nasty (especially since Eileen already struggled with her weight). She remembered eating and zoning out when she did because it was a way to combat the pain of loneliness and not being accepted. She shared with the group that she had never understood why she did this until I had asked her a few questions. She realized that she never “zoned out” while with people and friends.
Eileen became aware that it wasn’t that she needed to go on a diet or restrict eating certain foods – she actually needed to cultivate meaningful relationships with friends.
How can you become more AWARE of your tendencies towards emotional eating?
What are the circumstances that have come before to lead you to make the choice to turn to food.
Yesterday on my Facebook page I asked a simple question: “True or False? Food can be good or bad.”
Let’s just say I have some pretty smart Facebook friends! Most of them agreed that food is food – and it’s us humans assigning a moral value to it.
Yes, it was kind of trick question – because some might argue that food can be “good for you”, “food can go bad” or “food can taste good” but that wasn’t what I asked – I asked can food BE good or bad. And the answer is, it can’t. Food is an object. It’s like asking if a door can be good or bad. Or a blade of grass.
Somehow we have decided to add morality to our food, and when we do this it can often transfer over to us as humans. We assign this value to foods – a “good” food or a “bad” food and then we think we are “good” or “bad” based on the choices we make. It’s just not true. What you chose to eat does not make you “good” or “bad”.
You are not “good” person for eating a salad for lunch. And you are not “bad” for eating cookies for breakfast.
Remove this moral issue placed on food and accept it for what it is. Food: Material, usually of plant or animal origin, that contains or consists of essential body nutrients, such as carbohydrates, fats, proteins, vitamins, or minerals, and is ingested and assimilated by an organism to produce energy, stimulate growth, and maintain life.
What if you were told that you could eat whatever fod you want, whenever you want and however much of it you want?
Guess what – You CAN. You’re an adult right? So long as you aren’t stealing the food (because stealing IS a moral issue, eating is not) you actually have the right to chose 100% what you put into your gob. What do you think would happen if you actually DID eat whatever food you wanted?
Would you find yourself eating doughnuts everyday for breakfast? Would you eat a large pizza for lunch and wash it down with Diet Coke? Maybe. But I doubt you would do that day after day after day. After a while eating like that you’d probably start to feel like crap.
Plus I believe deep down inside we all crave HEALTH (not just being skinny/thin/fit but HEALTHY) and we all know that eating the above meal plan is not a recipe for health.
You know the saying the only things certain in life are death and taxes? I’ve always wanted to add on one more – we must accept the consequences of our choices.
What if gave yourself permission to eat whatever you wanted? Unless it was deadly poisonous the only thing we would have to do is to accept the consequences of our choice. So lets look at eating doughnuts and pizza – what would be the consequences of those two meals? Probably feeling sluggish, overfed, major sugar crash mid morning, indigestion, heartburn. And eating like that day after day then you’d probably see a few other problems, including (but definitely not limited to) weight gain. If you are happy to accept those consequences then by all means – enjoy the doughnuts and pizza. You’re a human adult and have earned the right to eat exactly how you like to eat.
What if you removed the guilt, shame, embarrassment and unworthiness that went along with the foods we deny ourselves? Would they be as appealing? Ever notice how as soon as we say we “can’t have something” we want that sooo much more? So stop denying yourself – give yourself permission to eat what you want, when you want, and as much of it – just be willing to accept the consequences and more importantly… pay attention which brings me to…
Listen to your Body
So you took my advice and ate EXACTLY what you wanted. How did it feel? Did you go overboard? Do you feel like crap? How long do you think you would ACTUALLY eat doughnuts and pizza If so that is actually your body (not anyone else) telling you “hey, easy on the doughnuts and pizza!” Your body KNOWS what is good for it and what is not good for it. (For some of you with a gluten or lactose intolerance that pizza might have left you running for the bathroom or in a brain fog for the next 5 days)
Listening to your body takes practice. We aren’t really taught that growing up, are we? Instead we’re taught love=chocolate on Valentine’s Day and to “clean your plate or you don’t get dessert” or “had a bad day? I’ll make your favorite for dinner – mac and cheese!” and “good job on getting an A in math – let’s go for ice cream!” It’s no wonder when we use food as a replacement for love, rewards and a comfort later on in life. It’s not always bad – I’m not saying it is. Some great memories can come from enjoying ice cream after a game with your kids. I’m just saying we can benefit from recognizing when we are using food to replace a desired feeling – acceptance, love, support, comfort and when we are using food to savor the taste and to ENHANCE the experience, not replace a missing piece.
I love to ask questions – of myself and others. Here are a few questions you might want to contemplate this week to keep you on track when dealing with emotional eating
- How do you want to feel? Will food help you to feel that way? Be honest.
- If food wont help you to HONESTLY feel the way you want to feel, what will? Remember, food might appear to help you combat your emotions but that feeling is typically temporary and leaves us feeling worse later on. (Lonely? Call a friend. Feeling unloved? Write down what you are grateful for in your life. Scared? Ask what’s the worst that can happen. Stressed? Exercise, yell, journal, say ‘no’. Sad? Ask for a hug. Look at pictures that bring back memories of happier times. When I am feeling down I love to call a friend and simply say “tell me something good in your life” – it always brings me up to know my friends are happy)
- How do you feel when you eat not based on wanting to savor the taste or feed your body?
- How do you feel when you eat too much? Is that they way you want to feel?
- How do you feel when you deny yourself food? Is that they way you want to feel?
Have you overcome eating emotionally? I’d love to hear what worked for you. Did any of this resonate with you?
Don’t forget to check out this month’s specials! Have a great week! Feel free to reach out if I can help in any way.
I never thought of myself as an emotional eater until I did my first Shakeology Three Day Cleanse. I never noticed just how often I got up through the day and found myself in the kitchen staring into the fridge or pantry seeing if magically there was something yummy to eat that I missed the previous 3 times I had been to the fridge already that day.
I quickly realized I ate when I was bored or when I was wanting to procrastinate getting something done.
It was a huge eye opener for me and I wanted to take some time to share with you a few other things I have learned about emotional eating since realizing “emotional” didn’t just mean sad, lonely or mad.
Here are the most common emotions or feelings people experience and then turn to food. Do you recognize any of these?
- watching TV and not really interested in it so mindlessly snack
- when you should be working on a project but decide to have a snack before starting – classic example of procrastination.
- not fulfilled at work and stopping by the break room helps the day to go by faster
- bored by a long commute home and hit the drive through for a milkshake to help the time pass
- Trying to get the kids ready for school and not having time for yourself leading to hitting the drive through on the way to work (which realistically probably took longer than actually making breakfast would have)
- Your friend is late (again) which wrecks the plans you had for the evening
- Had a rough day at work, kids are crazy and bills are piling up – food is the only thing that isn’t talking back to you.
- Feeling a lack of connection to true friends or family – food is comforting, it never lets you down.
- Missing a loved one – maybe you always shared ice cream sundaes and after they passed having one on your own helps the pain go away for a bit.
- Food never judges, it never complains, it’s always there – it fills the void you are missing.
- When you felt down did your mom help to cheer you up by making your favorite meal – macaroni and cheese? Do you find that you turn to mac and cheese when you are feeling sad as an adult?
- Feeling alone, even if you are in a relationship – maybe the spark is gone – you just want to feel loved, sexy and desired. Did you husband bring you chocolate when you were dating? hmm… that chocolate bar sure does look good…
- It’s what’s-his-name’s birthday from the sales department and everyone is having cake in the break room so you think “might as well, don’t want to be a stick in the mud.”
- “I worked out today so I ‘deserve’ to eat this”
- It’s free food or a buffet – what a deal! I better get my monies worth!
- Your co-worker got a new job and promotion and everyone is going out to celebrate.
- It’s what’s-his-name’s birthday from the sales department and everyone is having cake in the break room so you think “might as well, don’t want to be a stick in the mud.”
Do any of these sound familiar? You’re not alone. I often share in my challenge groups that food serves two purposes:
- To fuel our body
- To appreciate the flavors
When we are eating emotionally we aren’t always respecting these purposes. It’s important to be able to manage our emotions when it comes to food and to have systems in place to help combat emotional eating. Next week I’ll be covering a few of those systems but I’ll leave you with a sneak peak at the very first one.
Simply being completely aware and asking yourself a few questions before turning to food will help you take the first step to combating emotional eating.
“Am I actually hungry or am I craving a solution or quick fix to a feeling?”
This week I just want you to pay attention to how you are feeling BEFORE you decide to eat. Maybe jot down when you recognize that you are eating because you are stressed, lonely, celebrating or bored. Next week I’ll give you a few more tips to help you combat emotional eating.
I’d love to hear from you, are you an emotional eater? Have you overcome this or do you still struggle. What emotion is the toughest one to handle?
In my upcoming Challenge Groups we’ll be talking a bit more about emotional eating and helping you to find ways to overcome this. I’d love to have you in the next group, message me or comment and I’ll get in touch with details.
Don’t forget to check out this month’s specials!
I hope you had a fantastic Labor Day! I had a great day spending time with my active, healthy friends. It’s great having friends with similar goals and values when it comes to health and fitness.
Have you ever heard the saying – you become the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with? It’s so true! As I looked around at the people I was hanging out with it was mostly health conscious active people, which of course makes it soooo much easier to stay active and health conscious!
Well that’s great – but what if NONE of your friends are active and health conscious? I would recommend checking out sites like MeetUp.com which have activities all over – from volleyball, to hiking to bike rides and everything in between.
Reach out to your Facebook friends – even just having someone on the path to health and fitness WITH you can help keep you on track. You can even start a group of your own, like N.E.A.T to help hold people accountable.
Another thing I did this weekend was to volunteer at one of the aide stations for the Kauai Marathon. (I know, you’re probably thinking “why didn’t you just run it??” I actually really don’t like running so it was great to help out on the other side.) It was great to meet some of the runners and other volunteers out for the day.
Being around people who share the same values when it comes to health and fitness will help you to reach your goals much faster. This doesn’t mean that you need to stop hanging out with the friends you have currently – you might just find that you have MORE friends and more support! YAY! Friends!
I’d love to hear from you! Where do you meet your health minded friends? Have your relationships changed since you started on this journey? Have you made some new friends along the way?
Also – have you started a group of your own? If so I have a little present for you. If you have started a group on your own let me know – I have a little gift I would like to send to you. Reply back to the email or leave a comment. I have a limited supply so reply back ASAP!!
Don’t forget to check out this months specials!
Make it a great week – and let me know if there is anything I can help YOU with.
What do you do when you don’t make your goals?
This month I set a goal to do 20 blog posts in 28 days. Easy enough right?
Oh, AND I was also going to successfully run 3 challenge groups, a push group for my coaches, workout 6 days a week, play everyday, read two books, get another client for my 6 month health coaching program, keep up with my studies, reach my minimum goals in my Beachbody business, AND not drive my boyfriend crazy <<that’s an ongoing one!
Hmm… looks like I found myself at the “Life Buffet” and loaded up my plate a bit more than my heart, mind and soul could handle it, no doggy bags allowed either, I had to leave something on the plate, I was FULL.
I was so frustrated with myself in the beginning because I KNEW I had to let something go. In my eyes I failed. I said I was going to do something and I didn’t. Uggg.. I HATE that!
Here is what I had to ask myself
- Is your goal S.M.A.R.T? (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic and Timely)
- Did you try your hardest?
- How important is it to you to complete this goal?
- What needs to “give?”
Breaking it down
1. Looking back on my goal to have 20 blog posts in 28 days wasn’t exactly “SMART”. Realistically I barely eek out 20 posts in 6 months – much less ONE.
I needed to RE-EVALUATE the terms of my goal and make it fit MY life. I quickly accepted the fact that I was NOT going to post 20 posts in 28 days and “settled” for posting at least one time a week – that is something I can actually continue doing.
2. Did I try my hardest. Honestly, no. For this particular goal I didn’t. So I have no one to blame but myself. The truth is, if I REALLY wanted to do this I would have.
3. Clearly 20 posts in 28 days wasn’t as important to me as other goals I had. If it was I would have achieved it or at least answered #2 with a definite YES.
4. In order for me to accomplish this specific goal something would have needed to give to make space for it. Instead I left this particular one on the plate and I had to be ok with that. I had to recognize that I didn’t actually fail, I just didn’t make enough space for my goal to be achieved getting started.
One final tip, when making goals make sure they are something YOU can control.
You don’t always get to control how much the scale moves, but you DO get to control how much YOU move, you get to control what you put in your mouth. So focus on the things you can control. That way, even if you don’t get to the number on the scale you will know in your heart of hearts you
1. Set a goal that was SMART
2. That you gave your absolute BEST
3. That you knew WHY this goal was so important to you, maybe it wasn’t as important as you thought it was. What you chose to do each day shows you what is the most important to you.
4. You created SPACE to achieve the goal.
And of course, if at first you don’t succeed, keep going until you do! You CAN achieve anything you set your mind to!
What are you so worried about?
Are you really good at stressing yourself out over things that haven’t happened?
What about worrying about things that haven’t happened yet, and might not even happen?
I have been practicing a little trick that I have found helpful to help me work through times where I get into a cycle of worry, fear and doubt.
Here’s an example. I worry about money. I stress out about not having “enough”. I stress and play the “what if ” game over and over . I was asked a GREAT question the other day that practically made me laugh in the face of my fears and worries.
I was all stressed out and freaked out about money and the question arose
“What’s the worst that can happen?”
In a heartbeat a flash of a bridge came into my mind. I was fully honest with myself when I saw the image of me living under a bridge and stated that out loud. The WORST that would happen is that I would end up living under a bridge and as I said this I knew in my heart of hearts that I am NOT going to EVER live under a bridge.
I was able to take this fear of mine and say:
“I see you fear, but here’s the thing, that’s not going to happen to me. Realistically I am stronger, smarter and able enough to not let that happen. And worst case scenario, IF that were to happen I am going to pick the most awesome bridge there is – maybe a nice one over a beautiful river in the country where I have plenty of fresh water and not a lot of traffic noise and be really close to a nice meadow full of flowers.”
Acknowledging what is the WORST that can happen and then realizing that actually isn’t going to happen allowed me to let go of that fear and RELAX, so that I can get on living.
So “What’s the WORST that can happen?” I bet you have a solution for it – you are strong, capable and smart enough to figure out how to manage.
Attitude is everything
Do you see problems as problems or opportunities?
I saw a heard a great quote the other day – “What you GET is what you SEE”.
We have this freedom, this choice EVERY day in our lives to adjust our attitude, to adjust the way we respond to the things that happen in our lives.
We can look at things as road blocks or look at them as detours.
We can look at things that will break us down or things that will make us stronger.
We can look at things as hard and a boring chore or we can look at things that will challenge us and allow us to grow.
The problem really isn’t the problem, it’s your perception of the problem. Change your perception and you change everything.
- Laugh – even if nothing is funny – just laugh
- Ask a friend to “tell you something good that happened today”
- Vitamin D – get out in the sun for 10 minutes
- Pet a dog or cat (do I have to say a “friendly” dog or cat – or is that pretty obvious?)
- Have a good cry
- Hit a punching bag at the gym
- Head to a range – a golf range, a baseball cage or a shooting range.
- Be near water – river, lake, ocean, pond
- Feed the ducks
- Be still
- Watch children playing
- Remember this too shall pass
- Call a friend
- Take a deep breath and count to ten
- Turn the music up loud and dance
- Finger Paint
- Plant something edible – could just be a fresh herb.
- Include adaptogen herbs like Ashwaganda (you can find these in Shakeology)
- Yoga here is on of my favorite 45 min yoga DVDs – Select the Fountain of Youth from the drop down list
- Add some color to your plate with fruits and vegetables – proper nutrition will help with stress
- Say no – a great way to say no from Chalene Johnson “Thanks for thinking of me, let me check my calendar and get back to you”
- You know that big task that you have been putting off – like cleaning out the closet – just do ONE thing to get you closer – like just pick one shelf to go through or set a timer and work for 15 minutes.
- Exercise for 20 minutes – try two Ten Minute Trainer DVDs
- Go for a walk
- Read a book curled up on the couch – a feel good book – like the Happiness Project
- Exchange foot massages with your spouse
- Is money stressing you out? What one thing can you cut back on for this week? Coffee, take out, cable? See #31
- Unsubscribe from emails that don’t serve you – do you really need all of those great “deals” that cause you to spend more money?
- Hire someone to do what you hate doing, especially if you can get them for less than your hourly wage! (I love having someone else come in to clean the house)
- Just DO IT.
- Turn off the news
- Accept the things you cannot change
- Change the things you can
- Know the difference between 36 & 37
- Speak to yourself in a positive voice
- Unplug – turn off the 3G on your phone, no computer after 10pm.
- Enjoy a dinner with your family with no electronic devices or tv on.
- Decrease caffeine intake, you can do this in stages. Ultimately this will help you sleep. When you are rested you can handle stressful situations easier.
- Add more water – a dehydrated body creates cortisol, a stress hormone
- Let it go – so the dishes aren’t done, the bed isn’t made, does it really matter?
- Say YES to life! Read the book Yes Man or watch the movie.
- Recognize your stress triggers and take steps to reduce them from you life. Can’t stand the traffic? Leave earlier, ask to work from home, listen to an audio book while stuck in traffic.
- Feel your feelings. Feelings wont kill you. Dealing with them in unhealthy ways can.
- Take a hot bath with Epsom salts
- Light a candle- lavender is a great scent to help reduce stress
- Safety first change the batteries in your smoke detector (I do it when the clocks change)
- Get enough sleep
- Pause, take a deep breath.
- Sit on a bench and enjoy people watching and smile at strangers. Know that each one of us is dealing with our own internal struggles. You are not alone.
- Commercial tidy up – sneak in chores during the commercial breaks
- Personalize your workspace – photos of family and friends, fresh flowers (ditch the bowl of candy)
- Change your mindset – believe you CAN.
- Talk to yourself like you would your best friend
- Come up with some powerful mantras – “I’ve done this before, I can do it again”
- When stressing about something ask yourself “What’s the worse that can happen?” Then recognize if that actually WILL happen, probably not. Now take a deep breath. What are you worried about?
- Help someone in need.
- Visualize Success! See it in your mind getting through a stressful situation and it will be that much easier to achieve it. Your mind doesn’t know the difference between real and imagined
- Eat that frog! Do the most unpleasant task you have as soon as possible each day to get it done and out of the way – is that exercise for you? Check out Eat That Frog by Brian Tracy
- Understand and LIVE TRUE to your core values. I find I get really stressed when my core values aren’t being met, do you know your core values?
- Wear comfortable shoes and clothes.
- Be thankful that most of our problems are “first world problems”
- Are you stressing over something that HAS happened or MIGHT happen?
- Hang out with positive people – even if it is online in a group of like-minded people all working towards a similar goal – like my regular clean eating and fitness challenge groups! (email me for details!)
- Put your health first. Without it very little matters.
- Eat breakfast daily.
- Pare down – too much “stuff” can stress us out. What are you hanging onto that you don’t need? This is a hilarious take on how much stuff we have.
- Reflect on a recent accomplishment
- Know that mistakes mean that you are trying. Don’t be so hard on yourself
- Start a saving account with direct deposit from your paycheck. It can be $5 a week. Start somewhere.
- Play a board game
- Give a sincere compliment
- If you anticipate being stuck waiting at the doctors or DMV bring a small project – a book to read, a list of phone calls to make, journal to catch up on
- Look at problems as opportunities
- Tell people what you need and want from them. No one is a mind reader. Be clear. “I just need you to listen to me for a bit to let me get some things off my chest” If you don’t want advice from someone tell them. If you do want advice, ask them.
- Stop gossiping at work
- Take your lunch break outside as many days as possible
- Have a “plan B”
- Stop trying to multitask everything – our mind can only process one thought at a time and jumping back and forth will only slow you down.
- If you buy something new, donate something or get rid of something old.
- The past is history, the future is a mystery, today is a gift, that is why it is called the Present. Live in the present.
- Own your life.
- Take responsibility for your actions.
- Think as many positive thoughts in a row as possible.
- Ask for help.
- You don’t need to be perfect. What are you holding off from doing because you think you need to do it perfectly?
- What stands in the way of you and your next “right” action?
- Trust your gut -awesome blog about this here
One of my new found loves has definitely been mountain biking and I feel very fortunate to live in Queenstown, New Zealand where we have some awesome trails basically in our back yard! Literally, as I hang up my laundry I get to watch the mountain bikers on their last few downhill bits before heading back up the gondola to the top. This is the trail I ride the most -but it isn’t me in the video. I find riding almost meditative (especially the uphill and cross country) and the more I ride the more lessons I keep getting taught. I realize that these lessons don’t just relate to mountain biking but easily carry over into my daily life so I wanted to share them with you.
1. Look where you want to go. I have heard this in other places (gymnastics, skiing, etc) and I use this in many aspects of my life. When biking, if you focus on that tree you don’t want to hit or the edge of the bridge you don’t want to fall off of you’re bound to wind up there. Focus on the trail ahead of you and the path at the end of the bridge, not the dangerous distractions off to the side and you’ll be smooth sailing. Think positive, focus on what you WANT, not what you don’t want out of life.
2. Granny gear isn’t going to get you up the hill. This is one of my favorite lessons. There is this small but very steep hill that comes right out of a downhill and for the the last two years I’d get ready for this hill by trying to get enough speed on the downhill and put it into my lowest “granny gear” to get up the hill. Every time I would lose power 1/2 way up the hill and had jump off my bike and walk it the rest of the way. The other day I realized I kept doing the same thing over and over again and it clearly wasn’t getting me the results I wanted so I tried something new (sound familiar? That’s a lesson in itself!). Instead of going for the “easy” gear I went up a couple notches. By putting it into a “harder” gear I had more power and more traction and made it up the hill with no problems. What are you doing in your life in the easiest gear that isn’t getting you where you want to go? Step it up a notch – you’ll get to the top.
3. Don’t look at the giant hill. This is for those times that you come to a giant steep hill that you think – “I can’t possibly pedal up that!” Don’t get overwhelmed with such a large task ahead of you, aim to knock out bit by bit. When I get to that giant hill I pick little goals to work towards – “I’ll make it to that rock then walk the rest”. But what happens is I make it to the rock with no problem then don’t want to quit, so I say “Just get to that stick, now that leaf, now that other rock.” Before I know it I have conquered the hill one bit at a time and never felt overwhelmed. Little goals will help you reach your bigger goal.
4. Don’t give up – you will get better each time. After 8 months of being off our bikes, Chris and I were eager to get back into it and jumped on our bikes and began to tackle the hill behind our house. This used to take us 45 minutes, walking some of it and taking some breaks. Our first time back was embarrassing. We were so out of shape and ended up pushing our bikes up most of the hill and it took us about an hour. The ride back down was just as bad – our arms and legs were jello. It wasn’t fun and it made me wonder what I loved so much about biking. Of course I just wasn’t fit at the time and needed to get back into it. That was two months ago and now I feel myself getting better every time I ride. I can pedal up the entire hill without pushing and limited breaks. My downhill skills are getting better as well. I keep track of how long it takes me and how many breaks I take. I can literally see how I am getting better each time I ride. You are getting faster, better and stronger everyday you work towards your goal.
5. Get off your seat!! When I was a newer mountain biker I felt safer sitting on my bike seat going downhill and Chris would holler at me – “Get off your seat!” You’ll get better if you get off your seat and stand on your own two feet. Your legs will get stronger, you’ll find your balance and you will have more fun when you aren’t sitting on your ass.
Now if only I can get as good as these guys here – gorgeous video!
What a what to start a new year.
Earlier this week we ran out of internet.
What? What does that even mean – ran out of internet? Well here on this little island in the Pacific miles and miles from anywhere internet isn’t all you can eat and somehow we managed to make it through 20g of it. What they hell did people do before the internet? Guess I can log into my Kindle acct and download… scratch that, guess it’s off to the library.
A few weeks ago we headed out to a BBQ at a friends house. You know those days you just don’t feel like going out? This was one of those days, but we had said we were coming and I knew sitting at home on my couch wasn’t going to be any better. Towards the end I started chatting with this guy and he mentioned that he read a book called Yes Man by Danny Wallace and really enjoyed it. I knew the movie but didn’t know it was a book and added it to my requests at the library. Fortunately it came in when the internet went out so I had plenty of time to devour it.
Did you see the movie? It’s been a long time since I saw it but I remember thinking it was fun and cool. From what I remember about the movie it sure isn’t a remake of the book it but took the major theme of it – obviously.
I loved how funny it was. Maybe I was just in the mood to laugh but I honestly did laugh out loud. I think it is one of the things that drives Chris crazy when I read. We are normally together so he is victim of my random giggles while curled up on the couch.
I loved that it took me on an adventure. Danny kept it fun and there were a couple of main events that you definitely wanted to know what happens at the end. I enjoyed his nemesis and love interest.
I loved how while Danny was changing his life and saying yes more it was changing others lives and of course can change the lives of people who read the book. It reminded me of the times chance meetings have changed the course of my life. How saying Yes has already changed my life.
I consider myself a Yes Girl a lot of the time. I remember a time while traveling in Australia and met a guy traveling who invited me to spend some time sailing around the Whitsunday Islands. I declined because I already had an onward ticket. I still wonder what would have happened if I had said yes. I don’t like to have things like that in my life – where I wonder “what if”. For the most part I believe I would regret things more that I don’t do than things that I do.
As I read this book I think about the things I say no to and would I be able to do this challenge. I don’t like beer or coffee and am currently on 30 days of not eating cookies, cakes etc. Needless to say, saying yes to all of that would go against a lot of my goals, but it might also mean I say yes to all those gadgets on tv for the ab chair and spanx – could balance itself out…
Anyway… as I read books when passages stand out for me I do love to jot them down, so here they are:
~pg 142 – “The only time you have no opportunies is when you decide to stop taking them.”
Life is full of opportunities. You just never know. Give it a shot, at least then you’ll know.
~pg 168 – “I’m just saying that maybe sometimes it’s riskier not to take a risk. Sometimes all you’re guaranteeing is that things will stay the same. Sometimes it’s more important to say yes to things than it is to say no.”
You’ll probably notice that many of the passages that stood out to me focused on regrets. Saying yes to Chris and the opportunity he offered to me was WAY more important than saying no and staying the same.
~pg 242 “So maybe Yeses are meant to be shared. Maybe life’s about finding opportunities to share with someone. That’s all it is, when you think about it. A series of opportunities to share.”
It is so much more fun to say yes with someone. Chris has the means and wanted a Yesser to enjoy life with.
~pg 253 “And what do I mean ‘No was best?’ I mean No is power. No says ‘I’m in charge.’ Think about how many times you’ve said yes in the past year, and how many times you would’ve liked to have said No instead. Maybe being able to say No is the one thing that keeps us sane. Some people go through their whole lives saying yes over an over again- yes to things they don’t want to do but feel obliged to, Yes to things that allow other people to take advantage of them, just because that’s the way things are, the way things have always been. Some people need to learn how to say No. Because every time they say Yes, they say No to themselves.”
It was really refreshing to see him really struggle with his challenge and want to throw in the towel and just say NO! As a Beachbody Coach I do encourage people to say NO more. Especially the women/mothers who are so used to taking care of others that they no longer take care of themselves and it shows.
~pg 292 “When you think about it, probably some of the best things that have ever happened to you in life, happened because you said Yes to something. Otherwise, things just sort of stay the same.”
Chris often says “When you are lying on your death bead I doubt you’ll say ‘I wish I hadn’t traveled to Croatia/bought that kite/learned to spin fire/etc.’” I think he has a pretty valid point.
~pg 388 “Maybe I was reading all this wrong, but suddenly, not having said Yes to something that would have been great seemed worse than having said Yes to something that could have been bad.”
Anyway – I hope I encouraged you to check this book out. After reading it I bought two copies. One for me and one to give to a friend – seems like it would be a perfect gift. Here is is on Amazon or just check out Danny’s website. Oh – and let me know if you end up saying yes to something that you might normally have said no to